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The Deep-Level Mine Geologist

Things Geologists Do. Part 2.

Earth scientists are a well-educated bunch, although we don’t always come across as clever when we’re 5 beers in to our cups. Most geologists –other than self-taught prospectors- have some form of university degree. Many of my colleagues were so enamored with the University study-drink-drink-more-study-repeat routine that they did what I did, and went back to university to earn a master’s degrees or doctorate on top of their undergrad’ degrees. Clever bunch, geologists. But eventually, assuming you have no wish to be an academic geologist or a waiter, reality bites and some sort of salaried earth science career is needed to fund the pub breaks.

A pint of beer.
I hate work but I have to fund this somehow.

In June 1984, much to my surprise, I graduated with a decent degree. A few months later I was poking forlornly around the City of London, knocking on doors and handing out a naively-bad resume to any mining company that would take it. I got my break when Anglo American interviewed me minutes after I walked into their head office looking for anyone from HR to talk to. A month later I was on a plane to Jo’burg to start a 3-year contract as a mine geologist in the deep-level gold mines in what was then the Western Transvaal (now Gauteng Province). After 2 days in the city signing paperwork, I was shipped off to the small mining town of Orkney, where I was billeted in the single mineworkers hostel and unceremoniously thrown into the deep end as a shaft geologist on Vaal Reefs 5 Shaft.

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Normal Service Will Be Resumed

at the end of Hadrian’s Wall

For the next week, give or take a day, my wife and I will be hobbling along the full 135km length of Hadrian’s Wall in northern England, pork pie in one hand and well-thumbed Ordnance Survey route map in the other.

Anybody seen a wall? I’ve lost my map.

As I’m sure you’ve already spotted, this raises 3 questions. Who was Hadrian? Why did he have a wall? Where is the wall? And why would I want to hike it? OK, that’s 4 questions.

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It’s On The Right

Have A Look. Over There —>—>—>

Blogging is a lonely business. I sit in the urbancrows eRookery (my home office), writing and posting, day in, day out with only my elderly, arthritic dog snoring at my feet to keep me company. But I know you’re out there. I know I’m not actually alone. I know lots of you are reading “What Is A Geologist?” and then moving on to something more interesting, back to your fun-filled lives watching Celebrity Big Brother, or Episode 4 of Chernobyl.

That’s why I love it when someone subscribes via the cryptic little window on the right, over there –have a look. I get all tingly thinking that something I’ve written might be making someone chuckle for a few seconds and forget the daily humdrum for a minute or two.

The eRookery, complete with wilty orchid.

Did you know there’s tons of other pieces on the urbancrows blog? A piece on Crystal Power, that delves way back to the origins of my interest in geology. Or how about the whole category about my interest in classical music, where Thomas Tallis (amongst others) gets a pump? Scared of being mugged by itinerant chickens? You’re not alone. Plus an entire category, The Mining Biz, devoted to demystifying the fog of terminology that clouds the junior mining business.

You have Nothing To Fear But Boredom

Take a look at the other categories before you head-off. You might be surprised at some of the amazingly dull stuff I’ve written. And I take requests too. Seriously. Fancy an irreverent look at a subject dear to your heart? Drop me a line through the Comments window and I might take you up on it.

Go on. Subscribe. It’s free and what’ve you got to lose? I promise not to spam you. You’ll only hear from me when I publish something new.

Keep Scrolling Down For The Fun Stuff.

How To Survive A Bad Market

Serious Advice For Resource Investors

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.”

A Tale of Two Cities, Charles Dickens.

“This is worse than a divorce. I’ve lost half my net worth and I still have a wife.”

Anonymous Stock Trader.

Some things are inevitable. Death. Taxes. Sagging testicles. Gout. And market downturns: 4 of the last 19 years have seen hefty declines on the big boards.

The junior resource markets are mired in the absolute worst of times. It’s hard to remember when raising money was so difficult. First-time resource investors could be forgiven for thinking that losing money is the new normal. Nose pressed to the glass of the fancy restaurant windows, they stare wistfully at the caviar-gobbling wealthy inside who avoided mining stocks and bought cannabis instead.

The promised land of ten-baggers.
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A Guide to Common Ore Minerals

Geology students are trained to identify the commonest rock- and ore-forming minerals. It’s a vital skill for professional geologist. Sulphides, silicates, oxides, phosphates; we slog through dozens of them in our petrology labs, learning to identify the important ones using properties like colour, hardness, lustre (the way it shines or doesn’t), cleavage (how they split), density and such. As a kid, I loved this aspect of geology and by my early teens I could already identify the most common economic minerals such as galena (lead), sphalerite (zinc), chalcopyrite (copper), hematite (iron) and the flashier oxides and carbonates like malachite, rhodocrosite and azurite.

I Was Conned

But lately I’ve had this nagging feeling that I was conned at University in my undergraduate days. I missed out on an entire earth-science discipline, and I’m still stewing over it. I touched on this feeling of disquiet in an earlier post (Crystal Power).

I was conned. Honest guv. Second row up, far right.

In a futile attempt to scratch the itch, I decided to take a deeper look at the mineral properties we should’ve been learning about; the ones that haven’t made the mainstream textbooks yet. More’s the pity because I think these could be far more diagnostic and helpful to field geologists, particularly geologists with inter-dimensional Kundalini issues or Chakratic aura problems.

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A Handel on Something Baroque

A Musical Interlude

If you asked me to list my Top 10 “go to” classical music pieces, I’d start by opening up iTunes and taking a gander at what I’ve listened to the most. High up the list you’ll see Bach (Chaconne), Tallis (anything), Pärt (Magnificat), the incredibly romantic middle movement from Chopin’s piano concerto #1, and Beethoven’s violin concerto –in short, a real mix from across the centuries and all stuff that I go back to time and time again.

Handel. A man with a big wig.

One genre that’s under-represented is Baroque, a style probably most closely associated with German (Bach) and Italian (Vivaldi) composers. Bach’s the best known and the most accomplished composer of the Baroque era, rightfully revered as an astonishing musical innovator. Whilst I love much of his music, particularly the solo violin and cello works, I couldn’t listen to the entirety of the Goldberg piano variations in one sitting; there’s a bit too much mathematical twiddling around for me to maintain focus for more than 20 or so minutes.

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Infamy, Infamy

The Northern Miner’s Got It In For me*.

Despite my lonely role as the solitary occupant of the urbancrows e-rookery, from time to time I do get to celebrate a small win; some minor success that I can share with regular readers. And so it is, I’m happy to report that the esteemed mining newspaper, The Northern Miner, recently published 2 of my stories about Pakistan. They appear in the Odds and Sods column and are linked below.

Next stop. The Times.

A shout-out and big thank you to John Cumming, the dashingly handsome and discerning Editor-in Chief of the Northern Miner -a fellow geologist and deep thinker- who spotted my obvious story-telling talents. Or, more likely, he needed a few hundred words to fill up page 4 and was clutching at straws for content when my desperate-for-any-attention e-mails arrived.

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Tour Guides Gone Bad

A Thames Odyssey

Billy Beefeater. He’s funny and he knows it.

A good tour guide who can educate, amuse and engage all at once is a rare beast. Take Billy Beefeater, for example, a former combat medic with the Royal Army Medical Corp. who insults large groups of tourists at various scenic spots around the Tower of London. The man is a comic genius. He knows his audience; he knows his subject inside out -lopped off heads and disembowelled traitors-  and his delivery is split-second. He’s so good, I’m guessing he could make a useful living as an in-demand after-dinner speaker if he ever decided that professional tourist-abuse was losing its lustre. If you ever decide to visit the Tower, find out what time his tour starts. You won’t regret it.

Serves you right for being pro-Brexit.

A bad tour guide can turn any tourist attraction into 30 minutes of living hell. Fascinating history can be rendered anemically dull, and amazing architecture becomes mere detail, lost in the background as you’re herded from one boring stop to another, learning nothing in the process. But every so often, I’ve come across guides who are so spectacularly bad, so completely uninformed, you can’t help but admire them for trying, even though you know full well it’s going to go hideously wrong at some point.

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Things Geologists Do. Part 1

Report Writing.

In an earlier blog post, I took an unpleasant but necessary dive into the murky waters of earth science to ask the question “What Is A Geologist?” All very useful if you spot one in the wild, but it left many questions unanswered. At the top of the ask-list is something you’ll hear whispered by the senior management of every major mining company. Skulking in Blenz in Bentall #5, sipping on their triple shot, half-sweet, non-fat, caramel macchiatos with extra soy foam, contemplating the latest quarterly compensation figures, someone finally looks around the group and asks: “What the bloody hell do our geologists do anyway?”

Not to worry. Urbancrows is here to help with Part 1 of an interminably long series of posts “Things Geologists Do.” I promise by the end of the series you’ll have a renewed appreciation for them. You’ll gasp at their daily trials, and you’ll end up pushing HR to big-up their annual salary increment. Really.

Trust me, I’m a geologist. A bit greyer now though.
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Mediocre May

Stock picking club update

What follows is an edited version of my monthly junior mining update to the members of the carnivorous stock picking club informally known (for this month anyway) as the “Lows and Lowers”. The usual disclaimers.. all names of members have been removed and some of my more abusive comments have been diplomatically edited out. The update is firmly tongue in cheek so don’t take it personally if you work for one of the companies I’ve mentioned. Consider it a free daily dose of sarcasm. PS: may involve swearing.

So here we go…

Greetings Stock pickers,

I’ve just about recovered from the trauma of watching Liverpool beat Spurs in the God-awful Champions League final. As one wag on Twitter noted, he chose the wrong game to introduce some American friends to footie. Can you imagine paying good money just to see 2 top-flight teams stand around for 90 minutes, trying desperately not to get a shot on goal? Things were briefly livened-up by the appearance of a Spanish-style streaker. Beats the usual fat, red, drunk bloke from Newcastle that we English always seem to get in EPL games. Doesn’t the security guy look happy?

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